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VOLUME 1, ISSUE 22

04/22/2020 11:59:09 AM

Apr22

Rabbi Jeffrey Miller

Zooming Through Life

For the record, I've had a zoom account for well over a year.  I've mostly figured out the tools, like the choice of backgrounds:


or ….

Most people quickly figured out that a zoom dress code is “pants optional”:

 

I (usually) remember to mute the volume and video when the situation calls for it, unlike that BBC bloke on Twitter who was interrupted by his teenage son. Since The Vacczine is PG Rated, I am precluded from providing a link to that clip, but feel free to Google: "adorable moment of man interrupted by his son."  Any of the first 10,000 links should do the trick.  Incidentally, I regretfully inform you that the clip was a comedy gag and not a real event.

What was real was the TV anchor who accidentally posted her husband in the shower in the background.  Perhaps it was a mistake; perhaps she was trying to get a rise out of her audience.  Or her husband.  Perhaps the explanation is as simple as the fact that she is from Sacramento.

Two True Zoom stories:

  • I know an 11th grader who logs on to two classes simultaneously via two devices and pays attention to neither.
  • I heard about a High School boy who has a video clip of himself on a loop that he uses to pretend that he is “present.

I have a true Zoom story but I cannot share the specifics except to say that it involves a settlement conference and an unfortunate sneeze.  Whatever you may be conjuring up is not as embarrassing as what actually happened.

When I was a little boy (in the last century), I learned an old Israeli folk song called "Zum gali gali gali zum gali gali".  I haven’t thought about in about fifty-five years.  The chorus was the aforementioned zum gali …. and the lyrics, now they were magical:

The pioneer is for his work  Hechalutz le'man avodah
work is for the pioneer Avodah le'man hechalutz


From the dawn 'till setting sun
Every one finds work to be done
From the dawn 'till night does come
There's a task for everyone
(Chorus)
Join together in a song
Make the day's work seem half as long
Join together in a song
Come and dance and join in the song

The secular pioneers of Israel sang songs much like our own beloved "I've been working on the railroad" or "Heigh-Ho"

We are stuck at home, but at least we can zoom, gali gali!

By: Rabbi Jeffrey Miller

Wed, May 25 2022 24 Iyyar 5782